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itsjustliz

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[Links:| i'd give it all to make you half as happy as you make me sad ]

(no subject) [Dec. 17th, 2004|03:52 pm]

[info]_herheartache

(will have public and friends only entries)

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(no subject) [Nov. 29th, 2004|06:38 pm]
how can something that you can't see hurt so much?
emotions i mean.
they kill me.
every day.
first i'm happy.
next i'm annoyed.
now i'm furious.
feeling bitchy.
i'm rude.
i'm mean.
it happens that way.
i hurt so badly. my arms itch to be scratched with a pin. my head aches from too many thoughts crowding in. im shaking and i have too much saliva--that feeling you get before you throw up.

i'll explain later.
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(no subject) [Nov. 29th, 2004|06:38 pm]
how can something that you can't see hurt so much?
emotions i mean.
they kill me.
every day.
first i'm happy.
next i'm annoyed.
now i'm furious.
feeling bitchy.
i'm rude.
i'm mean.
it happens that way.
i hurt so badly. my arms itch to be scratched with a pin. my head aches from too many thoughts crowding in. im shaking and i have too much saliva--that feeling you get before you throw up.
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she's no baby--even though i've seen her weep. [Nov. 27th, 2004|03:38 pm]
what is up with liz today? lyke omg shes bein such a bitch!

lalala. i updated this look and feel shit. its all pink. matches my
WEBSITE (http://emotional-lately.com)!!!!!! GO THERE. i'm putting up some more content.
good news; i started my period. no more PMS for a couple o weeks.
bad news; i have cramps.
good news; we have advil.
bad news; i'm sick.
good news; oh wait there isn't any more.
bleh this is boring.
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YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYx82965476154726768062846520310.8796434 [Nov. 21st, 2004|05:52 pm]
i just got back from Lexington KY.
Here's what happened;
Friday
Left school early.
Went to target with dew.
YES WITH DEW. Hahahaha he was here!
Left for lexington.
Stopped for dinner at Cave City.
Arrived at lexington.
Stayed in a v. nice hotel. V. v. nice.
Explored the hotel, and Lexington Center/Rupp Arena. -None of the shops were open, because it was around 12:30 at night, but we window shopped (my mom and I). We were starving to death, but they didnt have any snack machines--just drink machines.
Went to vending machines and got pepsi. -bleeccchhh.
Went to the room and watched tv.
Tried to fall asleep.
Fell asleep.
Saturday
Got up around 8AM.
Took a shower.
Watched TV while my dad took his shower.
Went downstairs and ate breakfast (the nicest restaurant in a hotel)
Explored a bit.
Went back upstairs.
Went downstairs to get my mom's food at the cafe there. Stopped in at Hallmark to get her a card for me being so bitchy.
Gave my mom her coffee and food.
Explored more.
Got ready for the KY vs Coppin State Game.-where the hell is coppin state?
Went to KY vs Coppin game.-Kentucky won MAJORLY. Such an awesome team and game.Poor Coppin, whoever they are.
Came back to room and watched tv for a bit.
Went across the street for dinner.
Was ok, but not really.
Fell asleep.

Sunday
Woke up.
Packed up.
Left.
Got breakfast at Bob Evan's.
Slept in the car.
Woke up, listened to music.
Batteries died.
Stopped at gas station.
Came home.

And here I am!
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(no subject) [Nov. 9th, 2004|06:37 pm]
[feeling so |alone.]

another public entry;


this is so sad. i can't write without crying. i'm such a girl.
i can't help it. i'm like those mattresses that you press down on and conform to your shape. they take forever to take original form again.
my emotions will stay withered for a few days.
makes life hard to withstand.
i'm sorry i did this, but i am NOT sorry.
i didn't want a debate (aka a fight)
i've never been able to do it without getting hurt.
it's not personal. bullshit.
every word you say is personal in my ears.
EVERY word ANYONE says is personal to me.
how can i make it through another day.
feeling worse than this one?
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(no subject) [Nov. 9th, 2004|03:22 pm]
[feeling so |boredbored]
[tuned to |life after death and taxes by relient k]

[edit]
OK DEW LET ME CLARIFY:
I MEANT MEAGAN IS SICK AND GROUNDED. NOT ME. happy now? <3 ;)
[/edit]


"this week the trend; was to not wake up till 3pm
this week the trend; was to crash and burn to return again
this week the trend; was to backstab every single one of my friends and leave a voicemail message making amends and hope things work out in the end.
this week the trend; was to borrow all the strength you could lend to keep my head above the water and not descend.
and i just want to get held up at knifepoint just cut enough to wake me up
cause i know that i don't want to die sitting around watching my life go bye
and when we take the miss is what we'll get when we haven't quite figured it out just yet
cause all of us are all just stuck; stuck in a chair watching our lives blow UP"

went home early because of my asthma. went to davis kidd (local bookstore) and got a huge book. went to mickeyd's and got some chicken selects and a drink. stopped at logos (christian store) and bought the RK album. got flirted with at logos. came home. requested a song at the Vandy Station, didn't listen long enough to hear whether they eventually played it or not. got on the computer. made a new icon. dew wouldn't talk. got bored. talked to meagan. she's sick. grounded too. loaded the RK songs onto the cpu; listened to it again; listened to Hawthorne heights; got bored. still bored.

no complete sentences. wonderful.
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(no subject) [Nov. 7th, 2004|12:53 am]
[feeling so |pessimisticitchy! and bitchy.]
[tuned to |A.K.A. I-D-I-O-T by the Hives (ironic yes, on purpose, no)]

my mom seems to spoil my fun. like all i wanted was this cell phone, and I WILL PAY FOR IT MYSELF! If she and my father would give me some damn allowance for doing work, and good grades, but instead they buy me stuff for doing absolutely nothing, and i need to learn to save my money, but i can't if i never get any and just get stuff. i don't have a savings account and i don't have any money.
i sound like such a whiner. but i need to find a way, i never have any money, i never handle any money, and i need to! stop buying me shit and help me learn to spend...wisely.

it's 12:48 and i am up, not so awake but awake just the same because i have these HUGE welts on my back. they're hives but horrible ones. I don't know why it's happening, they're huge red and itchy, and I'm wearing a cotton tshirt, haven't used any new soaps, tried any weird foods, and haven't been playing with the cat. so strange.

i'm so itchy! and bitchy. i didn't take my zoloft today, and i was cool all day, because i was busy (went shopping with Meagan) and relaxed, but now that i have nothing else to do, being a bitch seems like something to occupy me while these stupid bumps itch so badly.

which is worse
having hives

OR

having a coldsore?

i vote for having hives. also can be used as a name of a fastpaced band.

coldsore just doesn't work as a band name. sorry.

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my heart is breaking. [Oct. 7th, 2004|11:40 pm]

Yes livejournal I'm here. I'm not dead. But have felt like it a lot.

You don't realize how bad you feel until you start to recover. Till things get better. Then it's like a smack in the face.

"Damn, I feel so much better."

But then it goes away again. And just when you think life might finally be on your side.

 

 

It leaves.

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(no subject) [Aug. 29th, 2004|03:57 pm]

BBL.

Forget this livejournal for now. I'm not deleting it forever, but things need to settle down in my life before I feel comfortable with sharing my feelings on the internet. I'mnot gonna update my myspace account either. But I'll be around on http://www.inevitableness.com and to read whats going on in my life, visit http://www.inevitableness.com/frisson/entries

XOXO.

Its just liz.

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